Since I was little I have always been that early bird that catches the worm type of person, sleeping in was never a thing for me. To this day I am an early riser, I love getting up before the sun or with the sun. This morning, for instance, we just had two days of rain and I grabbed my cup of coffee to sit on the patio, I closed my eyes and just sat quietly to listen to all the amazing morning sounds and breathe in the fresh morning air filled with the scent of the rain-soaked desert around me. If you have never smelled the Arizona desert after the rains, you miss out on one of the greatest scents, in my opinion, it is filled with the scent of the cactus flowers, creosote bushes, fairy duster bushes, oleanders, citrus trees just to name off a few of the many plants and trees we have here add in the dirt of the desert, it’s a scent that I love to smell, it fills and calms my soul and eases my mind. I listened to the birds singing over my head in the trees, we have orioles, woodpeckers, raven, scarlet tanagers, finches and a few others that I do not know the name of. I could hear the distant traffic of people getting on their way to work or in some cases coming home from work. I could hear the sounds of the Davis Monthan base getting ready to start the day there. The sun started to come up over the Rincon mountains creating a tinge of orange light coming through to my backyard bringing on the promise of a new day, a sunny day, a day filled with unlimited possibilities. This always brings me strong hope for a better day and a more positive look on life.
Being in my garden sipping on my coffee while watching the sun come up, listening to all the sounds and smelling the beauty of the morning made me thankful and grateful to be alive. It makes one become more aware of what is most important to oneself, it helps to get grounded and centered as well. For me, it’s my favorite time of the day, it’s when I feel that I get that little bit of “ME” time for the day before I start my day at work or even when I am not working. This is a goal for me now with this month, setting aside “ME” time and refreshing myself so that I can help others with my job so that I can be the BEST ME that I can be for everyone that I interact with, including customers, Ron, friends, family and so on.
The start of the “ME” time began when I had this past Friday off, so I drove Ron to work and I went to get my nails done. It didn’t start that way though. I had a mini breakdown that morning, while he was getting for work. I told him “Take the truck, I am going to cut my nails off and not worry about getting them done anymore. What is the sense?” Well, he wouldn’t have that kind of nonsense talk going on, he asked me “Honey what is going on? What happened?” I just told him how I really felt about myself, how down I felt, you know the negative kind of self-talk that we do to ourselves. It was “I am worthless. I don’t deserve to be happy or look good and the worst of all I am fat.” I just fell apart bawling my eyes out and I don’t know why I felt that way. I know it’s not true by any means. I may be a little overweight, I am not morbidly obese or unhealthy, in fact, when my doctor and I last spoke I brought up my weight, his response is that it’s nothing to be worked up over.
I know I am not ugly by any means.
I know that I am worthy of happiness, love, peace, serenity, and respect.
What is more, is I know that I do deserve it too.
I know that I am a wonderful person.
I am not conceited
I am not a narcissist
I love who I am
I am proud of how far I have come in life.
I am proud of my own personal accomplishments
I just allowed myself to fall prey to myself and that voice inside of me that wants to keep me down. I had to find a way to beat the voice and get rid of it.
I took Ron to work, came home and went to work in the garden of our home. I watered it like a mad woman, it looked like a big mud area with tufts of grass, the grass seed we planted hasn’t taken hold yet. I planted mojito mint, rosemary, and another Maura bush, then I spread the manure around and watered some more. As I worked outside I gave it all to the Universe and the Goddess I follow to release the negativity and self-loathing. As the time got closer to my nail salon being open I went inside cleaned myself up, cleaned the tears from my face took a deep breath and put on better clothes than I had on, what I was wearing was muddy.
I drove to my nail salon, signed in as they don’t take appointments and talked to the owners about the fact that I was taking their advice and moving from dipped nails to acrylic overlays. I have a beautiful natural nail that I just want to strengthen and have to look marvelous. We decided on acrylic overlays with gel polish, the gel is a cat eye polish and he threw in white dots on it to make it look like the galaxy on my fingers. I was overjoyed and started to feel like I am worth it. I kept telling myself “I am worth this, I deserve this.” My nail tech, Robert even told me that he is impressed with how healthy my nails are, how my nails tell my story and you can tell how healthy and clean a person is by their nails. I was excited and honored by his words. During our time together, we talked about gardening, about smoking food in a smoker. I even fixed his phone for him.
After my nails were done, I told them that I wanted a botanical pedicure done. So we went to the pedicure area where I got to have my choice of what botanical pedicure I wanted to be treated with. I chose the lavender one, which I have never done before. They took lavender and put it in the water basin with my feet, letting my feet soak up the wonderful aroma as well as healing properties of the lavender. From there the tech cleaned up the soles of my feet. I had to ask him how my feet look “Are they really that bad?” He said that they were not bad and he can tell that I take care of my feet at home. After he cleaned up my toes, heels, and soles, he went to put on my gel polish on my toes to match my fingers, once that was done it was time for the massaging to begin. We started with a massage with lavender lotion, followed by the hot stone massage and ended with a paraffin wax wrap. I was in pure heaven. All the while we talked and I read the next section of The Four Agreements: Don’t make assumptions and Do Your Best. I know that I share about this book so much, it’s making a huge impact on me. I am reading it slowly so I can absorb the words and get them into my heart, mind, and spirit. Now was an as good time as any to sit back, relax and enjoy my book.
After getting my nails done and having an amazing pedicure done, I felt wonderful, happy and refreshed beyond all words. When it came time to pay for it, the voice inside of me screamed out “HOLY SHIT WOMAN!! You just laid out $130 for that!! You do not deserve that! You should be ashamed of yourself!!” I walked out to my truck and that voice tore me up so bad I was shaking by the time I got into my truck. I called one of my best friends and left her a voicemail saying “TALK ME DOWN!!” I arrived at Ron’s job, told him what I spent on myself and he shrugged “That is okay, you are worth and you feel better right?” Well DAMNIT RONNIE!!! “Yes, I feel like a million dollars honestly. I am worth it, aren’t I? I deserved this! I worked hard for this!” He just smiled.
We grabbed lunch on the way home stopping at Church’s Chicken, unhealthy maybe but I had coupons and it sounded good, so why not. From there we went home to eat lunch together and he handed me his debit card to send me to get my hair trimmed as my pixie cut grew out a bit. After my hair cut, we ran to Walgreens to get hair color as I felt that I need to change my hair up a bit, a bit sassier and outgoing to match the cut I had done. I bought Purple Desire by Splat and we dyed it first thing Saturday morning, after my morning routine of going outside with my coffee.
The next thing on my list of things to do for me to take care of myself was to get myself some new clothes. We went over to Kohls Friday night and I found myself a few new t-shirts. I bought two off the clearance rack for $4.00 a piece and one on sale for $7.99, plus I had a coupon on the app for 15% off. We walked around the store finding some great items for the house that we both want to get. I ventured to the shoe department and found sandals that I plan on buying, no matter the cost. Since I am going to be getting more pedicures done I need pretty sandals and heels to wear. I got the register and they offered me 35% off my bill if I applied for a Kohls Card, well I knew I would not get it, I told the girl so, she said: “Try it and you still get 20% anyway.” So I did!! I got 35% off my entire and paid $12 for three shirts, this excited me so much. I am going back to Kohls for more clothes.
So for my monthly goal this month it’s self-love and taking care of myself. No, it’s not narcissistic to do so, regardless of what anyone wants to believe. If you really think it is the please go look in your mirror and look deep to see what you need to change that perspective or dream of yours. Self-care if not narcissistic it’s required in order to be a healthy and happy individual who wants to have a successful and fulfilled life.
Set aside “ME” time every day if you can
Go for a walk
Read a book
Play an online game
Take a bubble bath
Smell your favorite flowers, hell buy yourself those flowers
Live your life to the fullest and to the best that you can for YOU, no one else but YOU.
Remember most of all you deserve to be happy, healthy, peaceful, drama free and successful.
You deserve to celebrate YOU!!
Ladies and gents please what do you do to take care of yourself?
Share the way you take care of you here, let’s talk about it.
What is your “ME” time?